Saturday, November 02, 2013

Don't Dis The Dots ...

I love Dots.

I shouldn't love Dots. But I do.

And so this year, for Halloween, I decided that I would give out Dots and only Dots. Little boxes for most trick-or-treaters but big, theater-size boxes for the off-the-charts-adorable triplets who live two doors down.

I mentioned on Facebook that I would be doling out Dots and someone commented:

"Dots? Dots??? Oh, Beth. Even if it ends up being bright and sunny... you're not getting rid of that 'candy.'


I thought I knew you."

To which I replied:

"Not the hard nubs of dried toothpaste on paper, the chewy gumdrops in the yellow box."

Then added:

"And if you're maligning the chewy gumdrops in the yellow box, you clearly have no taste. Dots are awesome."

He replied:

"Yes. Those.

Your Halloween must be very lonely."

To which I replied:

"Dude. When I have a mixture of candy, folks *opt* for the Dots. You're just weird."

Weird indeed.

I had two specific moments when handing out Dots this year:

A very cute little boy – 5 years old, maybe? – came to my door and held out his plastic pumpkin for me. Plunk!, went a little box of Dots. He turned, made his way down my few steps, then went tearing across my lawn back to his parents on the sidewalk, yelling, "I GOT MORE DOTS!"

He was happy about it. Very happy. You bet, little man. Good on you. Your life is clearly on the right track.

And then the triplets arrived with their mom and dad. Thankfully, no one else was on their way to my door, so I was able to grab the big boxes of Dots and place them in their plastic pumpkins. Their eyes got huge. One of the girls grabbed her cellophane-wrapped box, thrust it at her dad, and said, "Can we open this?!"

Right on, sweetheart. Dots.

Mom and Dad reported that they love them, too.

So my Facebook friend is, indeed, weird.

Hope your Halloween was spiffy.

Next year, I may dole out big boxes of Dots exclusively. Come on by.

(By the by, I ended up picking up more candy, just in case, and it's good that I did, as I nearly ran out of everything. I bought Mounds bars — because the store seemed entirely out of fun-size Almond Joys because clearly, everyone knows how awesome they are, but I like the dark chocolate of Mounds; they need to make dark-chocolate Almond Joys — and Almond Snickers, which are really Mars bars. So chocolate was represented, as it deserves to be.)


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