Friday, June 03, 2011

Sudden Catharsis ...

Well, well, well, Shania Twain.

Who would have thought we'd have so much in common?

Not that we really have much in common. I didn't record the best-selling country album of all time and I don't have five Grammys and I didn't just get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and I am very surely not married to a handsome, accented man named Fred.

But last night, I was watching the latest episode of "Why Not? with Shania Twain" on my DVR and she said something that went straight to my heart.

She was talking about her fear of performing and said that it doesn't matter if there are five people or 50,000, it's all about the leap.


The fear of performing is all about the leap. It's not as though I can perform for 10 but I can't perform for 100. The crowd doesn't matter, however big or however small. It's the leap.

And I've made the leap, a couple of times, once at an open mic, once as part of a class.

And I make the leap every time I record, though that's less of a leap and more of a little hop because I'm comfortable singing for Brian. I still have shaky first takes – the first pancakes, I call them – but those are more about the time that elapses between sessions and less about singing for him.

But yes, the leap. Everyone has leaps, I know. But there's something about sharing one's artistry, laying bare a part of your soul, knowing it will be judged, that's so, so hard for me. And, clearly, others.

She set out on this journey to find her voice and share her story as a means to inspire others, and for that, I'm grateful.

I've written before about the moment that I stopped singing and finding my voice has been a long, slow climb.

But there surely is comfort in knowing that others are feeling the same way. Even gorgeous, talented, award-winning, rich and famous others. And she is truly talented. I was listening to some samples of her songs last night. (I don't own any of her albums.) And it's refreshing to hear true vocals. So much of what I hear these days is so overproduced, it's almost impossible to hear the singer's voice.

But Shania sings subtly. Anyone can make a lot of noise and sing big. Push enough air and you'll create sound. But it takes a lot of talent and control to sing the way she sings.

Which would explain why she's done so well for herself. And which will make her return to recording and performing all the more triumphant.

I'm rooting for her.

And on a much, much, much smaller scale, I'm rooting for me, too.


Anonymous Dave said...

It's why so many performers close their eyes while singing;-)

12:17 PM  

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