Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Say What ...

At lot has been made of Isaiah Washington making a bone-headed, bigoted slur, not once, but twice. Rightfully so.

Some stars, asked about the controversy, have said that political-correctness has gotten out of control and people need to relax.

Um, not in this case. Because, as others have pointed out, is roles were reversed and T.R. Knight called Isaiah Washington the N-word, no one would say that the world's just gone too P.C.

Some people say too much. Others, not enough.

Sometimes, it's hard for me to say what I really feel.

I spend too much time worrying about what people will think of me, too much time considering other people's feelings, even at the expense of my own.

Yesterday, that changed.

That's not to say I'd never spoken my mind before. I have, but with more pre-speaking angst.

This time, I still took several days to muster the courage to send the e-mail, but once I did, I felt a sense of relief wash over me.

How nice to do something because I wanted to do it. Or, in this case, not do something because I didn't want to do it.

The power of "No." Teeny-tiny word. Huge power.

How nice to stop worrying about someone else's reaction and just stand up for what I know is right for me, for this time in my life.

Still, I wasn't as blunt as I could have been. I was friendly and kind while saying, "No."

I wavered, though, wondering. Everything happens for a reason, I believe. So what was the meaning of what I faced?

Was I meant to follow the path to see where it lead? Was that the test?

Or was the test whether I'd be true to myself and say "No" to something I longer wanted in my life or if I'd buckle and acquiesce so as to not risk hurting another person's feelings?

It's a no-lose proposition, I figure. I'm proud of myself for standing up for myself. And if I was meant to follow the path, it will present itself again, another way, another time.

2 Comments:

Blogger Jeff Hunter said...

This life thing is complicated. Maybe you were meant to say no to the wrong thing so you can learn humility or regret later on... Then again, maybe a no was just a no...

11:46 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

Yup, who can know, right? You can spend a ton of time analyzing every possible explanation and possible outcome, or you can just do what you feel is right at the time and keep on keepin' on.

12:06 PM  

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