Monday, August 08, 2005

Older Men ...

(Dipping into my "memoir ideas" file tonight for inspiration ...)

I've always had a thing for older men.

When I was younger, my friends had things for the likes of Shaun Cassidy and Leif Garrett.

Not me.

Two of my most vivid celebrity crushes of my childhood were Bernie Kopell from "The Love Boat" and Ricardo Montalban from "Fantasy Island," which aired back to back on ABC.

Saturday nights were heaven.

Tiger Beat magazine, the chronicler of heartthrobs of the day, was featuring Shaun and Leif, Tony Danza and Scott Baio. One issue (God bless the Internet for allowing me to find this instantly) featured Leif sitting on what appears to be a stuffed Dino (yeah, from "The Flintstones") with a coverline that says, "Win my dinosaur!" And "Scott: His Tender, Loving Ways!" Are you swooning yet?

(I never understood Tiger Beat. What does it mean, anyway? Were the guys on the cover the "tigers" in question? What about when girls were on the cover? I'm not sure why I'm using past tense. According to Wikipedia, you can still buy TB. If you go to, you get nothing much to speak of -- unless you want to subscribe online -- but there's a link to its sister pub, Bop. I clicked it and saw this quiz:

Who's the hottest rock star?

Billie Joe Armstrong
Pierre Bouvier
Benji Madden

OHMYGOD. I've never heard of any of them. Oh, hold on. AARP is at the door ... )

I was a subscriber, back in the day, to Dynamite magazine. I still remember the day the issue arrived that featured the cast of "The Love Boat" on the cover, supplying me with a permanent picture of Doc to fuel my preteen lust.

Today, the tradition continues. I wouldn't kick Liam Neeson out of bed (he's 53) and Sting's almost 54 (hey, his middle name is Matthew). Pacino is 65. DeNiro is days away from 62.

Back in my Thomson days, I made a list, a la the episode of "Friends" in which Ross and Rachel each pick five people they could sleep with if they ever had the chance. I'm firing up my old laptop from those days to see how today's choices match up or differ.

Ah. I picked 13, but asterisked my top 5. In no particular order, then:

Liam Neeson (53)
Harrison Ford (63)
Kevin Spacey (Only 46! Yeah, I know, he's supposedly gay. Don't care.)
Sting (53)
Colin Firth (Only 44.)

Average age: 51.8

Bernie Kopell is 72, and, according to IMDb, has a movie in post-production. Ricardo Montalban is 84 and is following up his turn as the grandfather in "Spy Kids 3-D" by voicing a character in the upcoming animated flick "Ant Bully." Do you think he's reprising his role of Khan, with the fake pecs? "It is very cold in space ..."

Ah, love.


Blogger Dave said...

Hey, Beth, now that spoke on the phone about this, I'm sure you're resting easy with the fact that you're not as far out of the music loop as you thought. 'Cause you now realize that you knew the bands that the selected choices for "hottest hottie" in the rock world. Of course, Billy Joe Armstrong is the lead singer of Green Day, Benji Madden is in Good Charlotte and Pierre Bouvier is the lead singer for A Simple Plan. I was glad to ease your pain.

Oh, and Dynamite Magazine rocks.

10:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:08 PM  
Anonymous Doreen said...

1st comment ... wonder what the heck comment #2 said prior to being removed by the blog administrator!!! LOL!! I had a subscription to Tigerbeat and Spec (can not find on web as it was)... As You know for me it was Donny Osmond, David Cassidy and in no particular order Bobby Sherman, Rick Springfield, and Michael Gray he was on the Brian Keith Show with Shelly Fabares (oy ... digging back DEEP) Anyway ... Donny and David are total idiots (how the "mighty" have FALLEN) Bobby is an EMT, Beth already blogged about Rick... and Michael ... LOL - went on to star in Shazam and the Brady Bunch movie ..... Thanks for the trip down memory lane!

9:27 AM  
Blogger Beth said...

Since Doreen's wondering, the post I deleted was spam. I won't censor people if they post legitimate comments, but spam has no place here.

9:31 AM  

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